Disconnection

What is going on in my life when I can lose touch with friends so easily? People I purport to care about have drifted away from me in recent months and years. This is my fault. I used to think that I could get back in touch with people I had not spoken to in months or years, and we would pick up where we left off. I'm realising now that this theory has its limits. I just found out that something awful happened to a friend of mine recently and I wasn't there for her. I need to change my thinking and be active in my friendships. This is going to be hard for me, as I tend to be somewhat of a spectator when it comes to old friendships. I don't take them for granted (at least not in my head) but perhaps my attitude and my actions - or lack of them - is interpreted this way.